Super Smash Bash
by JojoLightningfingers
Summary: In which boredom takes over and some Smashers decide to have a party. Rated T for slight language and slight sexual material.


**Finally got off my butt and rewrote this sucker! I feel much relieved.**

* * *

It started with the words "I'm bored." Sure there were fights everyday, both with blade and with food, but sometimes, the Smash Mansion was just...well...boring. "I'm bored," Roy repeated.

Marth threw the book he'd been reading at Roy's head. "Goddammit Roy, we heard you the first time, we heard you the fifty-first time. WE KNOW YOU'RE BORED."

"Aren't we all," Ike muttered. The heat and dullness of the Smash Mansion in the summer had everyone on edge – tempers were high, and there was nothing anyone could do about it. Except...

"How about we have a party?" Roy asked idly, kicking back on the king-sized bed.

Ike and Marth exchanged looks. "Hell, at this point, anything would be good."

"Agreed."

As the trio darted back and forth across the mansion, getting supplies and extending invitations, the day drew toward night.

While carting a box of punch out of the storeroom, a voice next to Roy said, "Hey, whatcha got there?"

The redhead jumped, nearly dropping the box. "Oh, hey Samus. It's punch."

"What for?" she asked casually.

"A party tonight. We got bored."

"Sounds cool. Mind if I come?"

"Sorry, guys only. Maybe next time?" Roy shrugged apologetically.

Samus remained silent for a moment before asking softly, "You wanna run that by me again?"

"I said, guys only. Not my idea."

The bounty hunter grabbed Roy by the collar and pulled him around to face her. "Please tell me I'm not gonna hafta choke a bitch?" she said sweetly, the grin on her face saying 'when I snap, you'll be the first to go.'

Roy's eye twitched. "You can come."

"Thanks." Samus released him and walked away whistling.

-

At eight o' clock, with everything in place, the doorbell rang. Marth answered it, admitting Samus and Red, minus Pokeballs. Red was in his usual getup, whereas Samus was in a sparkly red dress with matching elbow-length gloves.

Ike took one look at her and nearly passed out in a dead faint. As it were, he had to struggle to contain a raging nosebleed before she noticed. Roy snorted on choked laughter at the expression on Ike's face.

Samus heard this, and took it quite the wrong way. She was advancing on the pyro, ready to tear him a new one, when the doorbell rang again. Roy restarted his heart and raced for the door. Wolf, in leather, studs, and shades, greeted Roy with a firm shake before swaggering in like he owned the place. Pit, also in shades, was right behind him. Roy shot the angel a 'WTF' look, to which he shrugged.

Five minutes later, Mewtwo, Sonic, and Link entered, and the party began.

Music blared from the speakers. Wolf got himself some punch, checking out the scene. He smiled toothily as Roy took center stage with a microphone and started singing along with the song. The grayfur took a swig and nearly shot it out of his nose five seconds later as the redhead attempted crowdsurfing and whacked his head on the floor.

He was still laughing as Roy sauntered up to him with a tight air, rubbing his head a muttering darkly. The redhead snatched Wolf's punch and dumped it on his head before getting his own glass and drinking deeply.

Wolf considered punching the swordsman in the face, but knew that would just end up with him getting his ass kicked, and so tolerantly replaced the punch and watched the world happen.

The both of them nearly choked on the drink as they watched Marth hit the floor and breakdance like nothing else mattered. After several rounds of blinking, Marth popped from the ground. Leaning on the wall, pushing his sweaty blue hair out of his eyes, he smirked at Sonic. The hedgehog was staring at him with a wide-eyed, openmouthed expression.

Roy suspected that Sonic had challenged Marth to a contest or the like, then gotten royally owned at his own game. It sucked when that happened, he himself knew from personal experience.

Four minutes later, Mewtwo spiked the punch and left the room.

After that, it became a madhouse. Red dancing with one of the punch bowls on his head. Sonic zooming around at faster-than-sound speeds, jacked up on sugar. Link doing a strip dance. Wolf and Roy exchanging a 'WTF' look at a stark naked Pit flew over their heads. Moments later, an equally nude Marth zipped past. Ike making out with Samus against a wall. Roy, seeing the aforementioned, leaned over and threw up in the nearest punch bowl. He cringed away when Red poured some of the same punch in his glass. The Caramelldansen. In which everyone joined in, Roy included. The Caramelldansen was just too fun to resist.

"Gah!" they heard Red scream. "What the hell is in this punch?" Roy backed away slowly.

He was about to tell him, when Sonic barelled into him, knocking both of them into a topless Link. Link, with Marth and Pit, were in the middle of a spin-the-bottle party. Roy joined in, simply because he was bored.

After a few rounds, in which everyone would have been mentally scarred for life had they not been inebriated, Ike walked over, shirtless. Roy decided he didn't want to know and went to look for Mewtwo.

Hours of insanity followed afterward, and suddenly...the entire place was silent.

-

Roy woke up. The first thing he was aware of was the pounding in his head and the sick, fuzzy feeling on his tongue. _What was I thinking?_

The second thing he noticed was pressure on his chest and the lumpy mattress. He cracked open an eye, cringing from the bright light. A sheet of feathers blocked his view. Pit was curled on his chest. The mattress, he found, was not a mattress at all, but Marth.

All three of them, he also realized with a horrified twitch of the eyebrow, were buck naked.

_Oh no. Please tell me we didn't do what I think we did._

Pit woke up with a rustle of wings. "I think I'm gonna be sick," he moaned. With that, he rushed to the bathroom.

Roy rolled off as he heard Marth groan under him. "Oh god, how many martinis," the bluenette groaned, flipping on his side.

Ike, who Roy hadn't noticed, sat up on the floor. "What the hell was in that punch?"

_You don't want to know_, Roy thought to himself. Aloud, he said, "Next time...no more drinking games."

"I did WHAT with WHO for HOW MUCH!" shreiked Red to a hung-over Link.

The elf winced. "You're too loud," he sniped. "I feel like my head's going to explode."

Roy sighed. That settled it - no more parties.

-

A week later, the heat was acting up again. "I'm bored," Roy groaned.

* * *

**Hooboy... I don't know if this was failure on multiple levels, but I liked writing it. I hope ChibiStarLyte likes it too! Perhaps you do too?**

**I would not advise inviting those guys over.**

**And yes, there was a MarthxRoyxPit threesome off-camera. **


End file.
